Well that was rude of me wasn’t it? Write a depressed and morbid post and then sort of vanish.
But of course that’s not what actually happened. Life doesn’t usually allow for vanishing and when it does, it’s like a scary bad thing.
I’ve just been rolling through. I’m a little better and a little the same.
Stallion picked up his daughter on Friday. And as much as I’d love to name her Colt on here I think I’ll just stick to the general theme and call her Teenager. The kids were at their dad’s house this weekend. And now I’m past the flurry of the kids’ birthdays and the end of school and the start of summer camp so things should start to smooth out a bit.
Not only that but recently the kids’ grandparents on their dad side have reached out to me a bit more than before which is to say never. I could sit and theorize on why but I won’t. I’ll just accept it’s one of those things that comes with time. Time heals ALL wounds. Anyhow, their grandma and I just talked. She and her husband are taking the kids at the end of this week to New York and Chicago to visit family and friends. They’ll be gone a week.
For the record, I’m all for that. I know that their grandparents love them very much. I know that when they are with them, they get lots of attention and affection and are cared for lovingly. I even hear from the kids more often when they are with their grandparents than when they are with their dad. They actually prefer staying with the grandparents than with their dad because they have more to do and they get way more attention apparently. And I’m all about them developing relationships with the family that extends beyond what is here.
As much as I slightly cringe at the thought of them being away for a week, I do think it’s a worthwhile experience. They had an amazing time when we went to Virgina with family in the winter and this is very similar. Plus they get the added excitement of flying on airplanes since the grandmother works for an airline. And honestly the timing is helpful. My cousin’s wedding is the first of July, I’m the Maid of Honor, and there is a lot to get done. Overwhelming really. So it’ll be good to have the down time and work on things and rest. I woke up today feeling highly congested and that chilly little feeling that I get right when I start fighting a cold. That tingle in the throat and that weird, loopy head feeling. So yeah, the timing works.
I’ve been doing pretty well with the De-Frumpiness challenge this month. I’ve added flossing to my routine and I’ve added at least one extra brushing session a day. Mostly. I haven’t worked up the guts for the appointment yet but I will. I know I will. Maybe not this month though.
I did something technically stupid yesterday but I don’t feel very bad about it.
I used my Express credit card and went on a mini work clothes shopping spree for me and a mini Father’s Day shopping spree for Stallion. I went in because they were advertising their big sale and I wanted to find a couple shirts for Stallion. I had stopped going to Express because frankly their clothes felt way too young for me and I felt their style was changing and targeting the younger crazier stuff and the materials were cheaper. This time, that was simply not the case. Express makes these pants that fit me insanely well. I mean they hug all of my curves in the perfect way, they drape nicely, and I love the material because it’s not cheap feeling. These things stand up to major wear. And they were on sale and they had a great selection. Not to mention they had a lot of work appropriate tops on sale too and a lot of the ones I tried on fit so nicely.
Needless to say, the pressure for work clothes is off. And I feel so relieved. Yesterday, I did a quick rummage through the closet and drawers to get rid of some clothes (out with the old, in with the new!) and I felt some major mixed feelings– happiness that at least I was able to get new stuff and shame that things were in such bad shape. I had things that were completely faded, I had clothes that had seams coming apart, I found a couple tiny holes, pilling, etc. My wardrobe is still in pretty bad shape but at least now it’s mostly the casual clothes that needs help. Jeans are suddenly an issue for instance– not one of my five pairs fits correctly. Every pair of shorts I owned doesn’t fit me anymore either and I have major problems finding t-shirts that fit in a nice way. They’re either too tight, too short, or too big and billowy. But I don’t feel as much pressure to get the casual clothes right than the work clothes. And I feel pretty confident that I’ll have much better luck with the casual clothes in places like Goodwill and Ross.
Honestly I feel more pressure to get a handle on my work shoes but even that’s not too bad.
But I do have a bit of a spending hangover. I think in the end I’ll be fine. Some child support payments have come through that I wasn’t expecting and I had saved more money than I thought I would need for summer camp. So I can swing some of that money at the Express card and I actually think I’ll be able to pay off the whole thing in one swoop while still have money in savings. Camp is paid for and actually the trip to Orlando for my kids’ birthdays? Well that’s almost saved up for completely as well, can you believe it?
For fun do you want to play a guessing game? I can tell you everything I bought and you can tell me how much you think I spent. I’m just curious what the thoughts are on good values for clothes. Ready?
At Express, I bought:
3 Mens Polo Shirts
1 Mens Tee
1 Mens Swim Trunks
4 Womens blouses
2 Womens trousers
1 Womens layering tank
12 items total
TOTAL $: ????????
Did I tell you we are officially TV-less? Last week we got some message from Comcast informing us we could no longer get even the local channels without a box. I called and they said I’d have to pay about $60 a month just to get the first 28 channels and internet. So I said no thank you, asked for a deal on just internet, and kept that going. It’s so weird not having TV. But it works out well. Stallion and Teenager are major TV people and now they’re forced to do other stuff which is nice. I haven’t suggested they play one of the board games yet but I’m sure that’ll come up soon. I have a cabinet full of them and they don’t get much use yet.
Anyhow, that’s all I’ve got. I’m still in a strange mood– not really wanting to do anything but lay around in bed and eat junk food. See you soon.