I’m trying hard to not have a bad day today. I started fine, came into the office with a big smile and stuff and then…
Well I’m trying is all I can say.
Ex is short this month again. So far, I’ve only received a third of what he owes monthly. He says he’ll have the rest this Friday but I pointed out this Friday should be the first half of August, not the remainder of July. He ignored me.
On Monday, I had to pay Eldest’s summer camp because when we showed up Ex hadn’t registered him as he’d promised to do. So my account got overdrawn. He left me the cash but it was too late. I had to call the cell phone company and ask for an extension on the payment this month because there’s nothing left.
I can’t help it, financial problems really just suck me dry and leave me feeling overwhelmed, hopeless, and frustrated. I keep telling myself I’ll be fine soon. You all keep telling me I’ll be fine. And I know that we’re all right, but I also know it’s simply not the case right now and I don’t even know if it’ll be the case this year.
The bottom line is my monthly “fixed” bills come to about $2,620 a month. With daycare, my fixed monthly bills were $3,210. I take home about $2,900. My fixed bills include my rent, utilities, and my debt payments (minimums only at the moment, sadly).
I’ve done a lot to reduce my monthly bills, like ditching cable, internet, and subscription services. I work hard at keeping utility costs low. My cell phone bill is next at the hacking down block in about two months when my T-Mobile contract is up and I’ll likely switch to MetroPCS.
My biggest expense is one I can’t do much about and am not at all inclined to do much about– Rent. I pay $1,500 a month for a 3/2 house in an excellent part of town. It’s a BIG bargain as comparable houses start at $2500. I’m next door to my grandmother, live ten minutes (or less) from my Mother, live fifteen minutes (or less) from the kids’ school, live five minutes from the summer camp, and about ten minutes from my train station to work. The market here is total crap and pretty much I could expect to pay the same amount for a two bedroom apartment in less desirable parts of the city. That’s a huge downgrade for a paltry potential savings.
My next biggest bill, (thankfully?), is my debt. The payments on my car, student loan, and credit cards comes to $700 a month. $400 alone belongs to the car which is due to be paid off next July.
Of course, the alternate to reducing spending is increasing income. My blog isn’t anywhere near where it should be to even considering monetizing possibilities. I have very little spare time. And, I’ve gotten rid of quite a lot of stuff already so there’s not much left to sell.
At least, that’s what it feels like. Notice, by the way, I haven’t even broached the topic of my flex bills.
Let me put it this way– on average this year, I’m spending over $600 a month on food (groceries and dining out).
My gas bill is averaging $150 a month.
Uninsured medical costs for the kids and me are averaging over $215 a month.
The one thing I did do to increase income today was to follow-up on the Income Deduction Order for Child Support. I know not all single mothers are in this position but Ex has a (mostly) steady job with a very large Corporation. He makes very good money. Making sure the Income Deduction Order is put into effect is the most important thing I can do right now.
I do not intend to remain dependent on the child support income but for the next year and a half, I largely don’t have a choice. I can’t count on this income being around forever because who knows what may come but it is available right now and so I need to make sure I’m getting the money from him I need to cover the kids’ various bills and to help prepare for the future.
It took a few phone calls and things, but I finally got all of the information I need to fax the income deduction order directly to the company that manages the garnishments for Ex’s Employer. It takes up to 72 hours to appear in the system and up to two pay periods to go into effect.
I’m so tired of this. I’ve been patiently waiting since the finalized divorce in March. Now it looks like maybe August will bring some peace at last. Happy birthday to me I guess (not today, next month).
It’s a good thing I took matters into my own hands because the Ex is playing dumb. I forwarded it to his email this morning so he could pass it on to HR. He never responded.
I emailed him about an hour ago with this: ” I need confirmation someone at Employer has the order by end of business today so I can update the clerk of courts.” His cryptic reply was: “No idea. This is not my department.”
Hold on, my eyes just rolled right out of my head…
Either way, I’ve got something going and I’ve got a phone number and I’ve got a ticket number I can all use to follow-up with next Friday. I hate that it has to come to this, I do, but I’m not even going to try and be all prideful about this. My kids deserve to be cared for properly, the means exist, and I’m going to tap into them. Enough already.
Meanwhile, I’ve apparently entered some sort of self-destruct mode. I’ve gained about 20 pounds in less than two years and I don’t really care to do anything about it. I haven’t cracked open the book for the GRE nor have I registered to actually take the test. And all I want to do is consume large amounts of chocolate and read copious amounts of books so I can stay in La La Land forever. If you ever wondered why a man would tire of me, now you know.