Yves Saint Laurent died today. How sad! 😦 And how strange that I've had a very fashion-fixated weekend. Sex and the City on Friday night and on Saturday a hormonal breakdown about nothing fitting me and looking ridiculous while my friends look fabulous and how unfair it is and how hard it's going to be to get to where I want to be again and blah blah blah and then today it was Devil Wears Prada. 

I'm kind of in a funk. Yesterday really tipped me over I think. I've been reading my archives back to the pregnancy with Daughter and the proceeding month. Actually it's not a funk, it's a roller coaster. One minute I'm relieved and ready and confident and then I'm scared to death and wondering how the hell this is all going to work and wishing like hell that for JUST ONCE my stupid body would get its act together and kick into gear on its own accord and do it NOW thank you. I just want to get it all over with and yet nothiing is as it should be. Of course this weekend has totally wrecked me house again. Two steps forward, two steps back and here we go again. But I'm turned off to the whole thing and depressed and then not and it's ridiculous. 

I bought Twilight on Friday fo rmyself and a used version of Big Brain Academy. I finished Twilight today. It's a fun read. Goes fast. I want the others. When I finished Twilight, I settled into the couch with my DS to try Big Brain and it doesn't work. So not amused about that. Not even a little. So, tomorrow I have to be absolutely SURE not to be a slob. And I have to get dressed and get out of the house and exchange my video game and buy the next book (or two). 

But I don't want to really. I want to be in the hospital having my baby instead.


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