Just to post

This is definitely one of those things where I am writing to just write. To just type and blow some steam by pressing on the keys even though I may not really get what’s going on out there. I want to and I don’t want to and I’m not sure which side of the coin will prevail.

I guess my question is, without wanting to come off as completely dramatic or ominous and vague all at the same time:

How do you deal with something that is going to happen pretty soon that you don’t really want to happen but you know it needs to happen? What do you do when “if it’s meant to be…” just isn’t enough to settle you? What if putting your trust in a higher power or even just the universe or whatever is not comforting in the least bit?

I’m just back at that point I guess. The one where I see my dream, my vision so clearly. It’s RIGHT THERE. And yet… it’s not meant to be?

Ok I’m going to stop now because instead of helping me, I’m getting worked up again. Sorry to be a bit of a downer.

In unrelated and somewhat trivial news I guess, I finished knitting a baby blanket tonight. I’m seaming it up though and losing my mind. It’s striped but I didn’t want to carry the yarn because it’s thick stripes and I wasn’t sure how the edge would look. Now I’m paying the price. *sigh*


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